The Male Sponsor vs The Investor

I am a very introspective person. I have many conversations with myself. There is hardly a quirk that one can point out about me that I have not noticed yet. I am generally curious about myself and have often wondered what kind of person I would be if I was born in a different century; or if I was a bird; or (most often) if I was a man. I have had the whole "If I were a man..." *muse-fest many times. This is probably because twice in my life I have met people who have made me think, "You are my alter-ego! You are me, just male!" and it has been exhilarating.

I think I would ace the whole manhood thing. I have a diverse portfolio of beautiful friends so that says a lot about my taste. However, there is one area that still leaves me bewildered to date: the whole concept of being a male sponsor. You meet a beautiful damsel and treat her as if she is in distress. You swoop in and solve the homelessness that she was not even aware that she was suffering from. You revamp her living room furniture, despite the fact that it makes your inner Southern Belle show. You then go ahead to become her new fashion stylist who definitely does not believe in thrift shopping. I feel that some of the things I would be running away from in the land of womanhood are listed above!

Proudly sponsored by...


In this era of teaching a man to fish and promoting trade over aid; I have begun to see a new version of the male sponsor: the investor. In addition to the roles listed above, the investor provides start up capital to open a trendy business. Given his eye for fashion, the business is usually an up-scale hair salon or a trendy boutique. The investor probably thinks that he is playing the long game here. Eventually, the little social enterprise will sustain itself and his duties as a sponsor will come to an end. He can finally retire and focus his philanthropic efforts elsewhere. The investor is usually on to something. After all, the business will have a ready clientele in the form of beautiful damsels who are proudly sponsored by other male sponsors.

The investor's happiness is usually short-lived, unfortunately. He only realizes just how far gone he is when he goes to drop the beautiful (now entrepreneurial) damsel at her swanky boutique and before she pecks him goodbye, she turns to him and asks, "Babe, what about lunch money?"


*muse-fest (n): an occasion on which you embark on a journey of random musing... mainly about stuff that would probably see you committed if you dared to share!



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3 comments:

Sharon Njeri said...

THAT part i dont think ill do.uless im completely smitten.But i think i would be the typical dog.

Wilfrida Onyango said...

Interesting

Cyril said...

ha! Ivy, interesting read.. & well written.

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